WOOHOO!!! Congrats to all who came out for the fun! If you missed any of the stories, go read them here. Now let's read what the judge had to say:
Thank you Alissa for hosting another wonderful round of Finish That Thought! We had five entries in all and this group definitely took the challenge to heart. As a reader they impressed me with their range of creativity and emotion. Now, without further ado:
We started this week with Christina returning home to care for her sick father. In just the first paragraph you feel the character's conflict, her desire to do what she believes is right versus her desire to keep hold of her anger: "ever since he left mom, I'd told myself he didn't matter." Lauren's piece left me thinking about family ties and the perils of growing old. I felt Christina's forlorn hesitation from the start and Lauren's writing compelled me to stick with Christina right up to her resigned acceptance to help her sick father. Overall this story left me feeling melancholy and sad. Great writing!
A great witty piece! Poor Colin and his Tea-Tummy issues. Geoff's wonderful writing had me chuckling throughout. I especially liked the "superficial passion tattoos" not to mention the "flagrantly unfragrant fissile fusillade of flatulence would finally finish his febrile fumbling" - wooof, that is some flatulent imagery! This piece came to life and I empathized with Colin from his discomfort with his Aunts to his dilemma in bed. Well done!
A poignant first paragraph that explained the character's relationship with her mother in such a succinct way. It's hard with flash fiction to concisely describe a character but Stella succeeded! I especially liked the use of the seasons to mark the downfall of the character's mother. The criminal act of stealing cats was a great twist as well! It left me wanting to know more and maybe find out what ends up happening with the rats.
SPECIAL CHALLENGE CHAMPION: Emily
This story brought tears to my eyes, from the children laughing in the autumn leaves to the pristine grave. Such wonderful imagery ("She's not dead. She awaits me now, resting in her underground bed, white lace and satin lining flecked with dirt, and maggots feasting on flesh") to accompany the protagonist's pain. His grief is evident in every sentence. I especially loved the use of the Special Challenge and clearly pictured the colors of Fall throughout the piece. Nicely done!
GRAND CHAMPION: Dave
This piece is haunting right from the start then quickly turns horrific. Fantastic writing that had my heart racing. The ending was a twist, finding out that maybe our character is just as genetically modified as those he cursed earlier in the story was an exciting journey! Dave packs so much into such a short space that I'm both relieved that the struggle is over and left wanting more. Great work!