Woohoo! What a ride! If you missed any of our amazing stories this week, go check them out here. We had another RECORD NUMBER of entries this week (SIXTEEN!!! WOW!)! You made the judge work extra hard! Let's read what she had to say:
As one who usually pens the stories, this was news to me that choosing one grand winner was to be so difficult. There wasn’t one story I didn’t like and there were six that made picking the top dog all the harder. But alas, I have chosen a winner. In the end, it came down to story and the writing combined. I was surprised at how many took up my challenge. In my writing group, I’m referred to (if by no one, but me) as the Dialog Whore. A title I rather like. So without further delay, except to thank all who participated, Alissa for hosting, and Jamie for picking my mummy story last week, here are my comments and the winners.
I bought the medusa because Fred said he’d rather be dead than caught with a phoenix. The first line and where you went with it, really set the bar for everyone else. Nice acceptance of the challenge, all dialog and the use of a mythological creature. I’m not sure I understand why she bought her boyfriend a medusa thought. Liked the end where she’s a phoenix herself.
Poor Sally, or maybe it should be Fred I feel bad for after all, he’s now dead. I like the way your narrator decides being friends with Sally is a better deal than being friends with people like Fred. Not sure what to think about the gun at work, as I am a postal worker. Hmmm.
Nicely done with the challenge and I like the twist. The cop just didn’t get it. Fred’s been turned into a dog, do you think that’s somehow poetic justice?
I like the way the young girl wanted to drive the hearse today because its Halloween. And the comment about a fairy godmother. Nice touch with the glass slippers as well. As for the challenge, you hit the magical, but not the dialog only so challenge not met. Still a good story.
Challenge accepted in deed and I love the voice. I think everyone can empathize with buying and selling a used car, plus the salesmen are always a treat. He didn’t tell her about the dings, typical. What did happen to Fred? Well, a little poison maybe.
I like the way the two sisters are plotting against Fred, even if Gladys isn’t in the game exactly. Hawaiian shirt was brilliant. People generally love or hate them. Typo in there, but I ignored that. Although the unicorn was an unexpected twist at the end, it felt last minute.
Trying Something New
Challenge accepted for sure. I think you’re missing a word in the beginning of the story. I like the visual of spit roasting Fred. Followed by the twist in the end where she tries to drive it underwater.
Middle Earth Pawn
You nailed the special challenge and I love the mythical creatures that inhabit your story. One thing, with so many, I lost track of who was talking and who was what.
Dating is Never Easy
Boy, you’ve got that right, I don’t think I’d want to date a zombie. Sarah should def listen to Jennifer and not date a zombie for other reasons too. I like the chick-lit style of this one.
She's Your Vehicle, Baby
A dragon to ride and keep as a pet. Love it. I mean, who doesn’t like dragons and they’re so cute. I’d personally be worried they’d burn down the house, but what do I know. I like the way the dragon got in on the dialog.
Seems sisters are the theme this week. Good banter. Not sure I understood the end though.
A house elf to help keep the place clean. I could use one of those. And the part of the elf going insane if you shave its head. There’s the cross between Harry Potter and Gremlins with the rules. Brilliant. Even accepted the challenge.
Arrangement of Dreams
Going for the creep factor I see. So she was given him as payment for his parents to have better dreams, but he’s plagued with night terrors, nice touch. However, you have dialog tags and missed the special challenge.
chava812 @ gmail
A POCKETFUL OF STREUSEL
You do like to murder your men with food don’t you? Nice job by the way. I like the unreliable narrator. One thing I might comment on is everyone is looking all the time. He doesn’t like red.
Consumers cannot die while using the device. That’s great. Like a consumer has the power to know when they’re going to die. Interesting way to have a conversation by having the second party only hmmm. Wonder if Channel 12 will let her stay. This begs to be expanded.
Sunny Who Was No Popeye
You bring in mythology with the scarab beetle but miss the special challenge with dialog tags. I like the story and how the bug grows and changes. Fred’s fury comes out when she takes him upstairs with a predictable outcome when she leaves him alone with the bug. Or is it… nice twist at the end.
I’m taking liberties here because I can. I was told I could pick a grand champion, special challenge champion and runner ups for both, so I did.
Special Challenge Runner Up:
@CLpauwels Untitled. The voice came home to roost. If there ever was a time when someone wrote for the judge, I’d say this was it. And did a great job with the story too.
Special Challenge Champion:
@Edenslittleones Untitled. You think you could send one of those house elves to my house? I promise not to shave it.
@chava812 A pocket Full of Streusel Murder by pastry is just so delicious.
Rashatayaket Charmed. The dog clinched it for me. Justice served.
Congratulations to all! (Also, Rasha, you didn't leave a twitter account or email address, so could you message me so we can talk about your round of judging next week? Thanks! :) )