Thursday, July 24, 2014

FINISH THAT THOUGHT #2-3 - RESULTS!




SO SORRY!!! I had this in my email late last night, and decided to put it up this morning... Yeah. I just realized that thinking about putting it up is not the same as actually putting it up. Doh! Thanks for your patience (and forgiveness!). If you missed any of the stories, go check them out here. Without any further ado, here's what the judge had to say:




Five really strong pieces for this week makes judging difficult. Thank you all for taking on the prompt and running with it.
As anyone who knows me will attest, I am a softie and too nice. So I will take it easy on the exclamation points, adverbs, and other little things that distract from a piece and focus on the story.

Emily Karn

What a great idea with the vampire/zombie honeymoon suite. I love how our introduction to him is the spike being removed from his eye. You had a great twist on the trope to have the father-in-law be the one to kidnap the bride and to stake the son. There’s so much going on a mere 498 words here. With a little rewording this could be a fantastic piece.

Erica Rahaman

                First, I completely understand Tanner’s rage over serving turkey at a wedding. What’s next — tofu? That is almost as bad as having an ellipses at the end of the opening sentences.
                This is a very stark look at why you shouldn’t invite anyone to weddings. I’d love to know why our nameless killer needs an invitation to the wedding. The last line has me suspecting that Tanner’s little sis has shown up to berate him. It’s rough to be the killer when mom will find out. Your visual elements are superb.
         Such a great piece to be 511 words — or 11 over. I may be judging, but even I must abide by the rules. A fantastic first run in the flash contest.

Billie Jauss

What a great job of showing what kind of ladies that Elise and Sally are. I snickered at seeing how you changed out decay for cheap perfume (some may argue that those are one and the same). I do believe you may be obsessed with the word obsession, but then it works.  A little sad to see decay switched out with cheap perfume — but who am I to judge. Wait, I am to judge.

JM MacF

What a fun little story you’ve provided. I love how you kept it all in one charming scene. Percival and Wilfred remind me of the old bald men in early cartoons. They sound like Pride and Prejudice meets Wedding Crashers. It’s very nice to see how non-violent your story went. And now I want canap├ęs, thanks for that.

Lori

What a delightful psycho-killer tale. Martha is sweet other than that little killing thing. I’m not sure if this is a horror story or a cautionary tale about not using female justices of the peace / ministers, but either way well done. I love the twist on Martha killing her husband over a mistake. And she is pretty spry for someone of her age (50 years of loving him, plus twenty in the mental health ward).
If this is your “not best” then I can’t wait to see what you are able to bring out for future challenges. Thank you so much for sharing this with us.

Judging:

Alas, the matron in charge of this contest demands we have a winner:

Special Challenge Champion:  Billie Jauss
    Your deception element was awesome. I love how Elise tried to pull a fast one on Sally, but that Sally turned the tables on her. This was made all the better because we know that cheated on her boyfriend, so we knew to keep an eye on her.

Grand Champion: Billie Jauss
                Strong story, relatable characters, and a delicious bit of cattiness to win. Perhaps an odd obsession on obsessions which borders on inception obsession. 2Become1 is a wonderful name for their new business. This is a wonderful piece (and well played using the [] around decay to change up the prompt.





1 comment:

  1. Thanks for the prompts. I promise to do better next week. 500 words is a novel compared to the 55 word challenge I usualy write.

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