Monday, March 10, 2014

FINISH THAT THOUGHT #36




I was so blessed to have my Momma, all my sisters (missing a couple brothers :( ), and all the kiddos (Nine cousins!!!) over at the house this weekend! So I'm feeling in a family-love kind of mood. If you feel so inclined to be inspired by this (or you thrive on extra focus and opportunity), I would enjoy reading some familial tales this week... But it's not really my opinion that matters here - the judge this week has a couple great prompts for you too. Go check them out and get writing!



If you need to read the full version of the rules, go here. Otherwise, here's the short version:

Rules:
1. Up to 500 words
2. Keep it clean (nothing rated R or above)
3. Start with the given first sentence.
4. Optional Special Challenge
5. Include Twitter/email, word count, Special Challenge accepted
6. The challenge is open for 24 hours on Tuesday EST



Oh, and feel free to change pronouns, punctuation, tense, and anything in brackets to fit the story/pov/tone. I'm not going to be TOO picky... Our judge however...

Our Judge today is S. Patrick Cunningham also known as @spcunningham. Check out his blog here. Read his winning tale from last week here!




 Your first sentence for FINISH THAT THOUGHT #36 is:



[Her] stop was still several blocks away, but [she] stepped off the train anyway, just beating the closing doors.



 Your SPECIAL CHALLENGE from the judge is:


Include at least one fantasy creature (chimera, leprechaun, talking animal, etc.).



 AAAAAAAND WE'RE OFF!!!



10 comments:

  1. The Crown Prince Of Jerorekath

    His stop was still several blocks away, but he stepped off the train anyway, just beating the closing doors. No one else seemed to notice anything out of the ordinary, was he going mad? A dull clunk answered his question. He looked back, the unicorn that had tailed him for the last half-hour banged its horn against the glass in frustration. His pesky little sister Bronwyn, was obsessed with unicorns, so when he had first seen the white horse with the silver horn he had recognized it immediately. What he couldn't comprehend the reason for its pursuit. Reputedly they were only interested in vigins. Steven definetly didn't qualify. He hurried away from the platform, he didn't want the creature following him home.

    His house was just in sight when it stepped out of the alley in front of him. Gracefully the long horn lowered to threaten his groin. Steven gulped nervously, backing up against the wall. The unicorn followed. Sniffing loudly, it inhaled deeply. that was when he received the second shock of the day. "Thank the Light! You're still Pure!" It said in a rich bass voice.

    "I'm not a virgin!" Steven bit out belligerently.

    "That isn't the kind of purity I was examing." The unicorn said dryly. I meant that you hadn't been Touched by The Tainted yet. You are in danger Your Highness.Come with me if you want to keep your soul and live."

    Steven's jaw dropped open and he inched backwards." Go away!" He shouted.

    Silvery hooves chimed on the pavement as it moved forward. "I can't Your Highness,it is my duty to protect you."

    "I'm not anyone's majesty, just a regular person." Steven objected. "Who are you and what do you want?"

    I am Ethilawyr, the Guardian of Purity and I want you to come with me. Your father, King Careth Marek-Sadowska sent you to Earth for safe keeping as an infant, in truth you are Prince Stenwulf, Heir to the Kingdom of Jerorekath."

    "That's crazy! My parents are Frank and Joan Flynn."

    "They adopted you. Come, your future awaits."

    "No! I don't want to go!" He yelled.

    "If you remain here, The Tainted will Touch you and your soul will be lost to The Darkness."

    "Who are The Tainted and why would they want to touch me?"

    "They serve the essence of evil, The Darkest. Their Touch injects his vileness into a soul, corrupting it. Their master wishes to rule all of Jerorekath, what better way to do so than by controlling the Heir to the Throne? You've dwelt here safely for seventeen years, but now they've found you.'

    "What about my family?"

    "If you stay they'll be Touched, leave and they'lll be safe."

    Steven sighed, he loved his family. "All right, I'll go with you." Dark blue eyes fastened upon him, trapping his gaze. They glowed brightly, he was drawn into their depths and the world he had always known slipped away.

    500 words
    Special Challenge Accepted
    karnemily@yahoo.com

    ReplyDelete



  2. The Gift
    432 words

    Her stop was several blocks away, but she stepped off the train anyway, just beating the closing doors. She’d had enough of the voice chattering away. The old woman had droned on and on about how ungrateful people could be when she tried to give them gifts. She looked like her grandma but more wizened and toothless. She smelt like she should have died years ago. It was difficult to smile and talk back to the crone with the respect her mother had taught her to give to the elderly.

    Pulling her designer jacket tightly around her slim shoulders, she shivered, thinking about the consequences if her bag or jacket had caught in the doors. She’d have made the front page of the local newspaper, ‘Girl dragged to her death’.

    “You’d have made a right mess, who’d have cleaned you off the side of the train?”

    She looked around, the voice sounded like the old crone but she was safely left on that train.

    “I’m here my lovely”

    She swivelled her head left then right, twisted around to see behind her but couldn’t see the old woman. She felt a nip on her ear and squealed, swatting whatever it was onto the floor with a thump

    “Ouch, you ungrateful girl”

    Looking down, she nearly stood on the thing with her six inch Jimmy Choo’s. It was ugly and held one of her ear-rings in its tiny claw.

    “Give me that back please”

    The thing smiled up at her. It had a disconcerting radiance that filled her more with alarm that happiness. It sprang back onto her shoulder and attached the ear-ring securely through her ear. If Jack, her fiancé hadn’t bought these tiny diamonds for her birthday she would have ripped them out in disgust. Her ear might fester with some awful infection. The left side of her face decay and drop off. She’d always prided herself on her symmetrical face. Her father had said she had the prettiest face in the state and he’d never lied to her before.

    “Who and what are you?” she asked. He chuckled like a banshee and nibbled her ear lobe again. She felt a sense of liberation. She could do whatever she wanted. She walked over to the steps leading up to the street. She was invincible. She could destroy or create. She put the spike of her heel into the calf of the man walking up the staircase in front of her. He stumbled and fell, sending a few other pedestrians sprawling. Laughing out loud she repeated her question again.

    “I’m your gift Missy”


    challenge accepted
    @stellakateT

    ReplyDelete
  3. His stop was still blocks away,
    but he stepped off the train anyway.
    Just beating the doors,
    He saw humans in scores,
    And decided to enter the frey.

    Being a centaur, there was little chance,
    He could escape with nary a glance,
    So he bravely strode through,
    Trying to stay out of view,
    But many commuters started looking askance.

    He was afraid a murderous mob would form,
    With fear and pitchforks they would swarm!
    But those few looks were the end,
    Into the crowd he did blend,
    As if a traveling centaur was the norm.


    Rachelle Wood
    95 words
    Special Challenge accepted

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I also decided to try writing purely with limericks, so I hope you guys enjoy it!

      -Rachelle

      Delete
  4. Hidden Places
    497 Words

    Her stop was still several blocks away, but she stepped off the train anyway, just beating the closing doors.

    “Hey!”

    The man she had seen from the train responded by speeding up his footsteps. Rose had to break into a run just to keep him in her sight.

    She knew it wasn’t smart. But when he walked by on the platform, jacket wrapped tight around his body and hat pulled down low over his eyes, she had to get closer. For all that he had been hunched over, there was no hiding the fact that he was easily six feet tall, and there had definitely been something off about the way his eyes reflected the light.

    The subway was abandoned but for the two of them, so there was no one else to witness the man’s daring jump down onto the tracks in front of her. The man didn’t pause as he continued his dash, not even looking back to see if she was still following.

    “Wait up,” she tried again. “Please, I just wanna talk!”

    The man was quickly vanishing into the darkness of the tunnel. Rose didn’t stop to think, she just jumped. She didn’t land nearly as gracefully as he had, but she managed not to injure herself. Breath coming in sharp pants, she began to follow. Keeping an ear out for trains, she picked her way over the tracks as fast as possible.

    For ten minutes she kept him within sight. Then he suddenly took a sharp turn, and vanished from view.

    Rose sped up, mind in a panic. She reached the spot he vanished at within seconds, but there was no branching tunnel. She looked up and down the tunnel, then approached the wall. There was nothing immediately unusual about it, but she reached out to touch it anyway. She ran her fingers along the wall, questions running through her mind. There had to be something-

    Her fingers hit a ridge, and she gasped. She ran both hands along the ridge, mapping out its shape. Halfway down the edge, her hand fell into a deeper crevice, which seemed almost as if it had been formed for her hand. She looked around before tugging gently.

    The response was immediate. A grinding noise sounded from the wall as the heavy door responded to her touch. It opened just far enough for her to slip through, revealing a dark corridor beyond.

    The darkness didn’t last long; as soon as she stepped through, dim yellow lights lit up along the ceiling, extending down the hall.

    The man stood before her, no longer hunched. He had removed his hat, revealing tall, pointed ears.

    “So,” he said, his eyes glowing with a pale blue light. “You’re sure, then?”

    She couldn’t say she quite understood the question, but she nodded anyway.

    “Come along, then,” he said, extending a hand. “There is much to see in the Hidden Places.”

    She took the elf’s hand, and followed him into the unknown.

    Samantha J.
    Special Challenge accepted
    funky_rutabaga@yahoo.com

    ReplyDelete
  5. My stop was still several blocks away, but I stepped off the train anyway, just beating the closing doors. I ran, without looking back, through the terminal, up the stairs, to the street. Then, I kept moving, finding people to blend in with, crowds to hide in. Doing my best to get lost, and stay lost. I didn’t stop until an hour after I got off the train.

    I hoped hiding in downtown Atlanta worked, at least for the night.

    “Stupid! That’s what I am. Stupid! Stupid! Stupid!” I’d met her a few nights before, at the Island Breeze bar. She had white hair with neon blue highlights, neon blue eyes, matching blue lipstick and nails. I couldn’t look away. She wasn’t stick thin like those Victoria’s Secret models, she wasn’t a stick with bumps. She actually had hips. Oh, man, did she have hips.

    She saw me staring at her. I couldn’t help it. She was different somehow. And my eyes kept finding her, and drinking in every detail they could. Every time she looked at me, I tore my eyes from her, and looked anywhere else as I took another chug of my drink.

    Yeah. She found me. Came right up. “Why do you keep staring at me?”

    “I keep trying not to.”

    She’d laughed. “Oh, really? Why?”

    I didn’t have an answer.

    “You here alone?”

    I nodded.

    “Good. So am I.”

    That’s how it started. I don’t know why, but I went back the next night, and she was there again. Instead of staring, and watching her, I walked up to the table she was at, and asked if I could join her.

    “I’d love it if you would.”

    I brought her home with me that night. Oh, what a night that was! Sex was something I hadn’t had a lot of, but I knew it would to find anyone better than her. The next couple of nights were great, with her taking what she wanted from me, doing what she wanted with me.

    It was the fifth night when things got crazy. That’s when her wings came out. Yeah. Wings. Followed by razor-sharp teeth. Her neon blue eyes turned black. She locked all the doors, and windows.

    She was a solitary fairy. You know. The scary kind. The mean kind. “You’ve been yummy,” she smiled this pure evil smile. “I think I’ll keep you around a while. And play with you.”

    I ran. I don’t know how I got through the door. I don’t care how I got through the door. I ran. “You can’t run from me, love! I’ll find you! I’ll always find you. You will be mine! You will!”

    How do I escape a dark fairy? And what did she mean by, “I’ll keep you around a while.” And what happens when that while is over?

    Gods, she had sharp-looking teeth.

    479 words
    @LurchMunster

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That's pretty nifty!

      Delete
  6. Frolic

    Her stop was still several blocks away, but she stepped off the train anyway, just beating the closing doors. As soon as she’d done it, she breathed a small sigh of relief and closed her eyes. She’d made certain her moments had been so nonchalant that Treyon hadn’t realized what she was doing until it was done. She smiled softly at the expression on his face as he’d tried to move through the crowd after her, even though it was already too late. She knew she’d pay for it later, but it would be worth the freedom for the moment.

    She looked around her for a moment, assessing her surroundings. Best to move on quickly before her guardian/fiancé caught up to her again. She was near a small park. Perfect! Quickly, she moved over to the grass, and toward the water she could now smell. Just the other side of a fairly thick stand of trees, she found the lake. A family of ducks quacked by, shaking their feathers at her. Looking around, she saw that the park was deserted in the evening’s gloaming.

    The shoes came off first, followed by everything else, and then she was water-walking. It wasn’t salt water, but it would do. Out in the middle of the lake, she did a small pirouette and danced over the still water. It was wonderfully freeing, to be alone for a change…to just…be. She began to sing, unable to help herself, feeling the air on her skin. Time seemed to stand still as the clear notes rang softly through the air. She saw the man come to the water’s edge drawn by her voice and knew she could call him out to join her if she chose, but those times were long gone. She stopped her song, then heard a voice call out sharply “Hey!” She disappeared below the surface, giggling, already phasing for Home.

    He’d been walking his beat when he’d heard the song. It thrummed against his senses and he found himself heading toward the lake, drawn by something unearthly. He’d never seen such a lovely sight in his life; the unclad and perfect beauty standing on…not in…on the lake and all he wanted to do was join her. He had just put the toe of his shoe into the water, when the spell was broken and he’d called out, but she was gone. He knew then he’d never tell anyone, because who would believe that as she’d vanished, a silvery finned tail had broken the calm surface of the lake.

    426 words {including title}
    Special Challenge Accepted!
    @Angelique_Rider

    ReplyDelete
  7. Brassy Buttons

    Her stop was still several blocks away, but she stepped off the train anyway, just beating the closing doors. She wasn’t sure why she felt the need to get off. Perhaps it was the thick air of colognes, or the constant wheezing of the woman beside her. Or she mistook “McNeely Street” for “Harley Street” on the loudspeaker. It was all of them together, she decided, and nothing to do with the wobble in her four-inch heels or her fuzzy vision.

    She had just shaken out her umbrella to catch the falling raindrops when a flash of green darted through her peripherals. Glancing up, the young woman surveyed the shop windows. She teetered over to the jeweler’s display case and peered inside. Jewels of every caliber littered the velvet cushions, but the green had vanished. The only sight was her smudged mascara and droopy red lips. Raising her umbrella over her frizzing, blonde curls, she continued wobbling down the sidewalk.

    “Was I drinking last night?” she mumbled to herself. Wrenching a hankie free from her breast pocket, she wiped the moisture from her forehead trying to remember. Last night was a blur, all a blur. There was a knock on her door and then a whoosh. Had there been a light? Her temples throbbed, assuring her there had been. Next thing she knew, she had overslept and was late for work.

    There it was again! The green flash whistled at her. She blinked. It was a little man in a green tuxedo with a four-leaf shamrock tucked into his green top hat.

    “Lassie! Come ‘ere a moment.” He waved her over. She looked over her shoulder, didn’t see anyone else, and obediently followed him into the alley.

    “I believe ye have somethin’ o’ mine,” he continued.

    “Something of yours?” she echoed.

    “Ye didn’t get a package last night? Nor a message to meet me here?” the little gentleman puffed in surprise.

    “I did...that is...I think I did,” her voice quivered in confusion. “I’m not sure...it’s all such a blur...”

    Before she could say another word, the leprechaun yanked the briefcase from her trembling fingers and pried it open. Amidst the papers, folders, and booklets scattered inside was a black velvet bag. When he touched it, it gaped open to reveal gold.

    “Ah,” his eyes gleamed “Thank ye for yer coop’ration. And now...” He fumbled around in his tunic and pulled out a strange looking box. “Look inside it, lass.” She did.

    Suddenly the ground opened and swallowed her. She didn’t have time to think, or notice him still holding her briefcase. Down, down, down, she fell...

    Beep. Beep. Beep. The alarm pulled her out of a deep sleep. Rubbing her eyes, she yawned and looked about the room. Everything seemed so normal, the dream almost forgotten, but her briefcase was missing. Instead there was a bag. Crawling out of bed, she tiptoed over and opened it. Sparkles flew out, momentarily spelling THANK YOU before vanishing, leaving four flakes of gold.

    Word Count: 500
    Special Challenge
    mary.lynne90@yahoo.com

    ReplyDelete